you don’t know what you’ve got ’till it’s gone.

We aren’t sleeping in our house, and honestly I am struggling.

Last week we thought the world was amazing.  Little Bub would wake up once a night, eat, and fall back to sleep easily.  This week he has decided to wake up every two-three hours with no real explanation.  This is made more disappointing by the clear ability to sleep he showed just 7 days ago.

With sleep gone, I am short tempered, forgetful, moody, and careless.  Things I wouldn’t describe myself as previously.  I don’t know how I am expected to be good at my job, patient with my son, maintain a relationship with my husband, or keep food on my table while I average 5-6 interrupted hours of sleep each night.

At work, I feel like I am failing . . . just last week I wrote an email and forgot to send it to the main addressee.  I copied everyone else except her.

At home, I get easily frustrated with everyone and everything.  I dread nighttime because I know it is going to be an ordeal.

Overall, I just feel like I am doing something wrong and that it’s my fault.

Things that don’t help:

  1. People telling me it doesn’t last forever.
  2. Hearing about how your baby was sleeping thought the night at 8 weeks, or seeing Instagram photos of your cute sleeping baby.
  3. Searching the internet for answers.
  4. Others telling me to enjoy this time because they grow up so fast.
  5. Begging and pleading my son to stay asleep.

Things that do help:

  1. Coffee.

I realize that this will pass and someday I will sleep more than 2 hours at a time . . . but it is so hard to see that future through the fog of current fatigue.  It is also selfish of me to think that I am the only one that is going through this.  For one, I know Farmer J is getting little sleep too.  I also realize that I am not the first mother to have little sleep, and I won’t be the last.

Bottom line is that is you do have sleep in your life, enjoy it.  Because when it’s gone, you won’t realize how much you miss it.

IMG_1234

At least he is cute in PJ’s, even if he doesn’t sleep in them.

Advertisements

One thought on “you don’t know what you’ve got ’till it’s gone.

  1. Pingback: fall y’all. | A Whole New World.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s